Friday, October 06, 2006


We're back in the hospital. Thomas ran a fever all day Tuesday, and Wedneday morning it hit almost 104. He's been sick and puny all week, and the fever only broke once for a few hours. Even our old EMT friends, returning us from radiation this morning, left with worried faces because Our Little Guy is not himself.

Living with cancer is like constantly being in the cartoon sight gag. We've walked off the cliff, and things go fine for a while, and then something startles us. We look down, and crash.

The doctors came in to talk to me yesterday, and I think they were almost as worried about me as Thomas. I told them that "sick" is harder than cancer. In the ER, we can always tell the difference between "sick" parents and "injury" or "chronic" parents.

Injury parents rush Johnny in with a broken arm or a twisted ankle, and everything is a huge emergency for the first couple hours. Then they realize their kid isn't going to die or lose a limb, and that the siblings have missed their naps. Eventually, Johnny gets hungry and the folks need directions to the McDonald's in Parkland. They want to talk about what your kid's in for. I don't.

Chronic parents have a babysitter for the sibs, and we bring snacks, toys, and magazines. Our kids are stoic. None of us is surprised by the wait. We can recognize each other, even if we have not met: we look at the child, and then the parent. We nod. The nurses know us, and we talk to them about various treatments to pass the time.

Kids who are in the ER for illness have been headed downhill all day at least. Their parents brought them to the ER thinking, "A doctor will know what to do!" But they won't be seen for a good while, and in the meantime you could exhaust yourself watching their pacing and hand-wringing.

Today was like that. We're on the floor, not in the ER, but I still have that "I brought him here for you to fix him. So when will he feel better?" feeling.

They seem to think Thomas's immune system is still weak from chemo, and that he is fighting a big, fat virus. He's gotten a little bit of every useful drug, it seems, and he is getting an infusion this afternoon. Blood usually perks him up. We'll see.

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At 8:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry Grandpa and Nana can't come and check on you since we both have been sick and don't want to share the germs. We love you and are praying for you please let us know if you need anything. I hope you are enjoying your Elmo!!!

Love Nana and Grandpa

At 10:20 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I HOPE IT(the blood)does help!

i love you all

love aunt rhonda


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